This is what it is....

Aunt Rosella

2010-03-06T22:54:58Z

Tonight I made Rice and Curry for dinner for my family.....I didn't think that the smell of the curry bubbling on the stove top would envoke so many emotions and tears.....you see, when I was growing up, I had a great aunt, Rosella, who was a missionary to India for 37 years. She selfishly served as a nurse there to the people, as well as sharing the gospel with them, and helping them to learn new skills to help their families....it was her calling and she was good at it.
And every time she'd come back home on furlow, she'd make our big family this dish called Rice and Curry....it was sooooo delish, and a dish that we all looked forward to SOOO much! It was such a treat, to hear her stores of India, and eat some of the authentic curry from there....although she made it very much "mellow" for us, they eat it a lot spicier! LOL

Anyhoo, about 10 years ago, I was babysitting my neice and nephew for a week, and she'd retired, and was living in that same town where I was babysitting....and I asked her to teach me how to make Rice and Curry....so she did. I painstakingly observed her every step and took meticulous notes....as I intended to make it just as delish as she did!!

Fast forward a few years later, and we have a big family gathering, and I get nominated to make Rice and Curry....and SHE is there....oh the PRESSURE!!! my sister and brother helped me....and it was a success...although she did say that the longer it cooks the less spicy the curry gets...so I learned something that day!

So, today I make it for my own family, and memories of Aunt Rosella flood back to me....I think of all the christmas'es that she was there, part of our family, she belonged with us, we were her grandkids....you see, she'd never married, and so she thought of my grandma's boys (my dad) as her children and their kids as her grandchildren....and she was just like another grandma to us.....she passed away in December 07.....and part of our family is missing at the gatherings......

I was telling Charlie about this being Aunt Rosella's dish, and I felt my eyes tear up, thinking of her and all the times she'd made this, and all the family memories.....I so hope that the family can have a big get together again soon, so I can make Rice and Curry, in Aunt Rosella's memory!!!

hopefullytrying @ 2010-03-04T16:17:00

2010-03-04T22:17:46Z

sick.

I got what Hope had this week---and now I am barfing like mad!!!

gross.

Of course my hubby is out on a job, so I've been home with the littles by myself, trying to maintain them
and barf....ack.

I hope my hubster comes home soon, so I can go to bed....I feel like poo.

hopefullytrying @ 2010-03-02T09:13:00

2010-03-02T15:13:35Z

Today is the day, 10 years ago, that our baby girl, Amanda Joy, was born silently into this world.
Her soul had already left this world, but her body entered silently, and all I heard was the sound of my husband weeping....

So today, 10 years later, is a day filled with remembering, and also joy, for we know where she is, and we know that
we will see her again some sweet day.
Oh to be with her! What joy that will be, for when we are with her again, we will also be with our Savior and Lord!!
I do look forward to that day.

So today, is not a day filled with sadness, but rather with love and joy, remembering the deep impact she made on my life, and the significant difference that she made in our home.
If it were not for her, I'm sure that I'd not be friends with many of you out there in blogland.....

So we are remembering today.......

random stuffs....

2010-01-25T19:16:26Z

So, it was my birthday last week, and my hubster has been working non-stop,
BUT he managed to surprise me, the ONE evening he was home, with a little party,
with some friends of ours.
He brought home a little ice cream cake--no leftovers--which is GOOOD! LOL
And he got me these!

A starter kit for Cake decorating and a Romantic Castle cake kit!!!
I'm sooooo excited!
I've wanted to do stuff like this since Charlie was 5, and my friend Tancy in Buffalo WY
did some awesome cakes for her kids!
So now, I need to find some websites to give me ideas and inspiration and guidance!!

Anyhoo, we are in the middle of a lovely blizzard right now,

and this is what my porch looks like:

And I leave you with this adorable pic of my baby!

Little Mr. "I'm so big now, I can stand!"

That is all, continue on.....

too early for me.

2010-01-25T12:05:20Z

I awoke at 4:30 am, with this odd feeling in my gut, to go check on Alex.
I did and he was laying in his bed, awake.
So I told him that it was still night time, and to go back to sleep.
ok.
I went back to bed.
Then baby woke up, so I got up and was rocking him.
Alex appeared in my room shortly after, I told him to go snuggle in with Hope.
He said ok, and disappeared.
I fell asleep in the rocking chair with the baby, and woke to hearing banging noises.
At first I thought it was just the wind, blowing something around outside, as we are in a blizzard.
Then I realized it was coming from IN the house, and I figured I'd better check it out.
I came upstairs, to realize that the light was on in the bathroom, so I knocked, to see if it was Charlie.
no answer, so I try the door. locked.
I go to the other door, also locked.
I think say---hello?
Alex answers--hello.
I ask him to open the door.
To which he responds a very firm and defiant "NO!"
ummmm---NOT ok.
I ask him a few more times, he responds the same.
I hear him rummaging around in there....and I'm wondering what he's getting into this time.
So I go get a butterknife, and attempt to pop the door open.
15 minutes later, lots of pleading and refusals, I finally get the door popped open,
to find my 2 year old, covered in soap.
nice.
To the bath we go, along with a very frustrated mama.
Baby is screaming his head off, has woken Charlie, who is attempting to help with him.
ugh.

It's now 6 am.
baby is back to sleep.
Alex is up and eating.
I'm praying he goes back to sleep SOON, because I can NOT make it on 4 1/2 hours of sleep without
being a raging crankymama.

ACK!
The terrible twos are TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!

I wasn't ready...

2010-01-25T05:21:55Z

But it happened anyway.

He Crawls.

yes, he's CRAWLING~!! ACK!

AND he thinks now that he's mobile, that he should attempt to climb the STAIRS!!

Both Hands on, now stand up...

Andddd lose my balance before mama gets to snap a pic.

But I'm ok, and now I'm gonna go for it again!

SOOOO BIG!!

I got ONE snapped, blurry yes I know, but it shows how he gets standing up!
lil stinker!!

hopefullytrying @ 2010-01-11T22:59:00

2010-01-12T04:59:52Z

Praise You in This Storm
words by Mark Hall/music by Mark Hall and Bernie Herms

I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

Chorus

I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

****************************************

comparison

2010-01-08T15:14:34Z

a comparison pic of my Dad holding Anthony in *tree branch position*
at 1 week old, and at christmas.

wow, he's grown!! And the baby has too!! LOL!!!!!!! j/k

Some family pix in front of the tree.

2010-01-02T04:00:01Z

There were a bunch more just like these, not a one of them is good of ALL of us!

LOL!!!!!
I guess that's what I get when I don't have a professional do them, and just have a non-pro friend
take some snaps! LOL!!!!

Little Mr NAUGHTY Boy!!

2010-01-02T03:45:40Z

Alex is in the TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, VERY BAD, NO GOOD, AWFUL, OMG I WANT TO TEAR MY HAIR OUT, 2's!!

In part, I blame the cold weather, I can't send him outside in the yard to play every day for hours, as it's been 10 below or worse.

So, I've decided to start taking photos of the naughty.

It's a GOOD THING that he's soooo CUTE!!!

And THIS day, he dumped out my BananaGram game, and poured Garlic Salt, Season Salt and Olive Oil on the tiles
then stood there and laughed.

I WOKE UP to this, nice.

I get this look ALOT from him. haha

I'm sure there will be many many more Mr Naughty pix to come......stay tuned!

1st Cereal!

2010-01-02T03:27:29Z

Anthony's been nursing like crazy lately, and it's starting to get to be too much, so I thoght I'd give him some cereal to see if
he's ready.

he wasn't real sure of it at first.

made some hilarious faces!

But he did end up eating about 2 T. of it!!

Then he decided he was tired, so Papa took him and put him right to sleep!!

Awww!! Such a sweet lil fatbaby sleeping in papa's arms!!1

Some Christmas Pix

2010-01-02T03:11:21Z

My mom and dad came, with Charlie (we'd sent him to them on the train the week before) on Christmas Eve.
So She and I and the kids decorated some sugar cookies to leave for "santa".

Anthony thought they were tasty!!

We were playing Boggle, and my Dad shook it, and he said it came up like this:

wow. A christmas Miracle!! LOL!

Here are some random shots of the kids opening gifts.

Hoep was VERY VERY excited to get Polly Pockets!

This is what Anthony did most of the time:

She was VERY excited about ALL her gifts! LOL!

Lil Poser!

We got Alex his Tonka Truck....he's been stealing them from
random kids when we go to the park or the lake, so we thought he needed
his OWN!!!
He was THRILLED!!!

Alex also got a BUNCH of matchbox cars, and a big semi to haul them in.

Some Imaginex "Dino-Roars" as he calls them

Charlie and his BIG present! WHAT could it BE?!?!?!

A boxing bag on a stand! He wanted one sooo badly!

he also got a cell phone, gun wrap, nerf gun, a toy 4-wheeler.

lolz

2009-12-21T15:24:11Z

my preggo sister and her silly sil!

ahhahahahhahahahhaha!!!

a lame attempt

2009-11-01T00:33:33Z

Here is my pathetic and lame attempt to make Bakerella's trick or treats, mine are supposed to be eyeballs!!
lol

It's WAYYYY harder to make than she makes it look on her site!!!

horrible news....

2009-10-30T20:06:44Z

I'm feeling pretty upset right now....I just found out that my friend Jayme,aka out_of_mana who has twin boys Ryan and Dylan- a month older than Anthony, that one of her twins--Ryan--has retinoblastoma in BOTH eyes!!!
I'm just sooo upset for her.....she's a 3 times loss mama---that means that she's buried THREE babies, and now this---how much can ONE mama handle??
Her hubby was deployed, so the Red Cross is sending him home to be with her and help her and their boys!!!

I'd love for you all to join me in prayer for them all!!

scream!!!

2009-10-19T11:27:16Z

Up till 1 am with fussy gassy baby.
Up again at 3 with fussy gassy baby.
And up now for the day at 5:30 with fussy gassy baby, and toddler that the baby awoke.

It's gonna be a GREAT DAY!!

hopefullytrying @ 2009-10-17T00:31:00

2009-10-17T05:35:38Z

This morning before school Charlie causually mentioned to me that he thinks he *effed* his math test yesterday..... I was like ummm what?!? He repeated that he'd *effed* his test! I loled and then explained to him that he needs to say *i got an f* and not *effed* because it meant the f word. He got a horrified look on his face as the realization dawned on him what he'd said! Lol! What a kid!

Process

2009-10-08T00:08:55Z

PROCESS

Somewhere in the quiet night,

a baby slips silently away....

too soon....so soon, and

I'm left weeping in the light of day.

The shock of it numbs me

and shakes me to my core.

The knowledge that my baby's gone

is to much, I cannot handle more.

Oh God-WHY?! Oh Why?!

my heart cries out in despair.

I feel so empty, alone and

rejected of His care.

Shock suddlenly gives way to anger

and my head is full of rage.

Stolen from me; Taken!

How could this happen at this age?!

The anger slowly fades away as my

heart accepts our horrid fate

I cry out to God for help,

praying it's not too late.

He wraps His gentle arms around me

and quiets my grief with His Perfect Love.

I soundly sleep in peace.....finally,

knowing she's cared for---up Above.

9-29-09

Stephanie Marottek

for Amanda Joy

Dentist

2009-10-07T22:50:33Z

Just got back from taking Hope and Charlie to the dentist for cleanings.
Alex watched.
Next time, in 6 months, he'll get a cleaning too....hopefully!! LOL!

Bad news, Charlie and Hope both have cavities and have to each have 2 more appts to get them all fixed.

UGH!!

The hygenist asked if Hope drinks alot of juice, I said no, she usually wants water or milk.
Then she asked if she chews alot of gum. yep.
What kind? I said the one in the pink round thing, and it's a loooong piece--oh Tape Gum? yep.
Evidentally that is one of the WORST sugary gums ever, and her teeth are decalcifying at the gum line...
sigh.
So NO MORE tape gum, daddy is the one to buy it for her all the time!!! So HE'S getting a talkin to when he gets home!

And the dentist also lectured them on brushing MORE.

I guess I get to be the *healthy snack nazi* and *brush your teeth nazi* and *NO GUM nazi* now....sounds like fun to me!!
ha,

Alex did okish, watching, but his attention span is like 45 seconds long, so hopefully in 6 months he'll be
able to sit thru a cleaning!! ha. We shall see!!

ok, off to make them brush their teeth!!

sharing

2009-10-07T15:47:04Z

It's sooo sweet that Alex is starting to share.....but NOT so sweet when he's trying to
share his sweet tarts candies with the baby!! He was laying next to him, and then I heard
him say, "here baby, you need one" and so I went to look, and here was a sweet tart, sitting
on Anthony's cheek, that Alex had put IN his mouth, but that GOD that Anthony spit it out!
Thank God for tongue thrust reflex!!!
whew
So I had a talk with Alex about what Anthony can eat--only milk from mama's booboos....and how
Anthony is not a big boy like Alex....I hope he gets it and does not choke the baby while sharing!!
eek!!

hopefullytrying @ 2009-10-06T12:33:00

2009-10-06T17:36:55Z

This morning I nursed Anthony, then set him in his lil bouncer seat....he's such a
content baby.
So he started sucking on his hands and cooing, etc....next think I know he's
quiet,
so I look over at him and I see this. too cute!!

Sound Asleep!!

He also slept thru the night again last night. From 10:30 to 6:30!!

And after his morning nap, I heard him *talking*, so I went up a few minutes
later to check on him, and he was just laying there, looking around and talking
to himself....he's soooooo GOOD!!

Gosh, I just cannot get over how SWEET he is, and soooo CONTENT!
God knew I really needed a good baby, after having Hope and Alex aka Miss Sassy Pants and Mr. Messy.
LOL!!!

ok, off to take a nap with my kiddos!!!

Princess

2009-10-06T15:42:19Z

This morning, Charlie made instant oatmeal packets for himself and Alex, then Hopey came upstairs, hungry.
And of course dressed in her finest tights, dress and a crown with a handkerchief under it, over her hair!
I said, Go have Charlie make you an oatmeal.
She looked at me, incredulous and said with distain: "Princesses don't eat oatmeal."
and shook her head, like she couldn't believe that I didn't know that!!
So I asked her what Princesses DO eat, "Fruit!" she stated.
ok then....!!!!
LOL

fluffy mail!

2009-10-03T15:58:38Z

So the other day, These came in the mail from my fluffy mail fairy!

A diaper and matching booties, and booties to match the diapers I
already had made!!!!
Squeeee!!!

And do you see that tiny little teensy diaper????

SQUEEEEEE!!

It's for my keychain!!!!

And it actually opens up like a REAL diaper, and it's sooo tiny!!!

And booties to match the diaper covers I already got from her!!!

soooo cute!!!

And my sweet boy modeling them!!

THANK YOU diaper fairy----you totally made my WEEK with that package!!!!!!!!
HUGS!!

delicious

2009-10-03T14:51:25Z

This baby of mine!
He's sooo sweet and content and just amazingly delicious!!

I love when he's nursing, and will look up and me and smile, then dive back again onto the breast,
nursing furiously, as if to make up for those few sucks that he missed by grinning at me,
but then he does it again, like he just cannot help himself,
but to tickle the fancy of the giver of the milks, with a gorgeous little grin.

Then, he falls asleep, still hooked up....sucking occasionally,
as if my breast is a paci....or maybe reassuring himself that he's still in my warm loving arms...

There is just something YUMMY about a sleeping baby, snuggled deep into your arms,
fully relaxed and breathing deeply....just makes me feel soo...... mushy inside......
I want to just eat him, I love him so much!
The feel of his little body just fully trusting, resting on me is amazing....
the curve of his fat lil cheeks and the soft rise and fall of his chest....
an occasional little moan or grunt, as he dreams of only-God-knows-what.....
his sweet little chubby hands relaxed, the deep dimples of his knuckles......
his lips parted as he is completely resting.....I'm just sooo amazed at the lovleyness of him......
the delicious way his head fits into the curve of my neck,
and the perfection of his lil bum resting on my arm.....
the feel of his smallness, the sweetness of his back.....
the chubbiness of his legs, his tiny fat feet....
Just everything about him is soooo delicious!
he's just SOMETHING WONDERFUL.

hopefullytrying @ 2009-09-26T09:28:00

2009-09-26T14:32:32Z

My sister just announced her pregnancy!! She's due with #3 in May 2010!!!!!!

I'm sooooo excited for her!!
I was just telling my friends that she needs to get preggo, since she and I have gone back and forth
having babies since Hope!!
So, she kept up her end! LOL!
And I'll be passing the torch to Laura, my brother's wife-- for my year! LOL!

Anyhoo--here is how my sis told me!!

Look at how HAPPY she looks! Isn't she just a BEAUTFUL preggo!!??